Wednesday, April 9, 2008

All The Answers

I woke up in a contemplative mood this morning and began to ponder life, the universe and everything. I was unsettled and wanted to seek answers to the ultimate mysteries. Not knowing the answers troubled me and I sought to gain insight into many of the deepest problems facing Homo Sapiens.

I thought long and hard and battled with my own intellect and sense of reason to answer why we are here, how the universe began, what spawned the first organic materials. I delved into science books to read the massive volumes of evidence and observations of the natural world.

It was all too much for me. The questions were too deep, too troubling, too profound. Then I remembered someone that I knew would have the answers. Someone who could take away this troublesome, nagging feeling of uncertainty and doubt about life, the universe and everything.

So I telephoned the local pastor and he kindly explained that "goddidit".

There we go, problem solved. No need to worry. Curiosity satisfied.

I inquired, “but who created God pastor?”

“Don’t question that my son,” He replied, "Else you might find yourself burning in Hell for eternity.”

Well that sure shut me up. My curiosity was quelled by the threat of fire.

Thank God that goddidit. Now I don’t have the think about it and I can get on with my day.